Callous love.
July 4, 2010 by Chad
There’s this weird battle being waged near my heart. It’s passion versus apathy. I do not understand it, and to say it frustrates me would be a gross understatement.
Though I am no doctor or scientist, or even a college graduate for that matter, I am thoroughly convinced that something horrible has happened to the human heart over the last 40 years. Somehow it’s been rewired, and it no longer functions as it should. This rewiring I speak of cannot be explained through medical terminology, because, as I said earlier, I am no doctor and have not the intellectual capacity to explain to you how this rewiring would work.
Here’s the thing though; this rewiring of the heart has caused it to function irregularly. And this irregularity that I speak of is that it focuses only on us. We only think of ourselves, and only feel when we feel sorry for ourselves, or feel like we want something for ourselves. When we see people in need - a homeless man sleeping on the sidewalk, or a homeless woman hungry on the side of the road, our heart does not feel. It’s been rewired, as I explained earlier. And I feel like the perpetrator is APATHY. Apathy has rewired our hearts, and caused us not to feel when we should feel. Not to show compassion or feel compassionate when we should. Our heart doesn’t know how to react to the fact that 3,500,000 men, women, and children are homeless in America. So it doesn’t feel anything.
Now obviously I am not speaking of the physical heart, but the emotional heart. The one that breaks when the girl you’re in love with starts dating your brother. And the one that feels gladness when you let an elderly woman cut in front of you at McDonald’s.
And that apathy is trying to rewire my heart. Let me tell you, I spent years tearing away the wires in my heart. I realized in my early 20’s that I didn’t care about anything but myself, and realized that Jesus probably wasn’t fond of that thinking, since one of His greatest commandments was to love my neighbor as myself. The more I grew in my relationship with Christ, the more wires he tore away from my heart, allowing me to feel the pain of those in need and giving me the ability to show compassion. And now apathy is trying to operate once again.
I think that this sort of thing probably happens more often than not, and I am absolutely sure it’s the enemy at work, trying to disarm our ability to be Jesus to those who are in need. I’ve found that the only way to fight off this enemy is to draw near to the Lord, and beg Him to break your heart again for the things that break His heart. It’s one of those dangerous prayers that you might be nervous to pray, because having a broken heart isn’t exactly on anyone’s top 10 list, but I think it’s needed, or else we will not feel for our homeless, hungry, and hopeless brothers scattered across the globe.
Draw near to the Lord tonight. Beg for a heart that feels.
CommentsPray
May 10, 2010 by Chad
Hey friends, family, and other supporters!
The last few weeks at I Love Evelyn have been bumpy, but God has been faithful, and His peace has helped us overcome any difficulty we have encountered. Here are some things you can be praying for us about;
1. Pray that God would give us favor in the community
2. Pray that our Non-Profit status would move quickly through the government!
3. Pray that God would provide another building in another location.
4. Pray for our homeless friends who are struggling with addiction - and pray that we have the wisdom to help walk them through those issues.
5. Pray that God would provide the finances we need to move forward with our vision!
6. Pray that God would use our new film, The Cries of the Broken, to help raise awareness and break open the apathy most people have towards homelessness!
God has always been faithful to us, even though sometimes his faithfulness doesn’t look like we originally thought it would. We just want to stay in the middle of what God is doing!
CommentsFatherhood, love, and homelessness.
March 30, 2010 by Chad
I am 27 years old, and I am soon to be a father. My wife could go into labor at any moment. And at that moment I will only be a few hours away from being responsible for a very little person who depends on me to love him/her, guide him/her, and take care of him/her. (We won’t know the sex until the little person comes!)
The reality of where I am at hasn’t sunk in, and I am sure it won’t until the moment I see my child for the first time. Already I love that little thing more than I’ve ever loved anything. This baby is a part of me. A gift so precious and beautiful from God that I could never thank the Father enough. Just to think of the first time my child looks at me.. what sort of love will I feel then? When it’s arms embrace my neck. When he/she cries for her daddy? Just the thought of it creates a swelling sensation in my heart.
As with most things, me being so close to fatherhood makes me think of all my homeless friends scattered across America. They are someone’s child. They are sons and daughters and grandsons and granddaughters. They were once babies, depending on their parents to love and care for them. Now they have been forgotten and given up on. Do you ever think about how that must feel? To know that you aren’t wanted by your family? To know that you have no other place to go other than the abandoned building on the edge of town? Could you imagine your son or daughter living in those conditions? Can you imagine your son or daughter as a young adult walking around the city, hoping to find food? Can you imagine your son or daughter being arrested because they fell asleep on a public sidewalk?
The homeless of America aren’t just a group of alien people who have no worth; they are our sons and daughters, fathers and mothers. They fell. They dream, hope, and fear. The heart in their chest beats, and their lungs breath in deeply. Their eyes see. As a new father realizing his love for his unborn child, this creates within me an even greater desire to go and love those who have been lost, neglected, and pushed aside.
What must our Father God feel about all those who are lost and in need?
CommentsThis blog
April 14, 2010 by Chad
This is the new ILE blog.
It will be maintained by the staff at ILE, meaning either Chad, Sean, or Kent will be writing. We update this thing daily with stories of what God is doing in our lives and what we are seeing downtown Texarkana!
We have the opportunity to hear so many crazy stories that would break your heart, and we want to share those things with you so that you can better understand the realities of homelessness. I think some people just assume that people are homeless because of mistakes they made - which can sometimes be the case. But we hope that through this blog your heart will be broken and compassion will find it’s way into your life. It’s our desire to see the community get involved in loving those in need. We believe that we can reverse the conditions of homelessness and see change created in our streets.
Always check up on new blogs!
love-chad
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